Do you like to write lists of chores for your husband? Maybe remind him now and again that the toilet seat was left up? That the floor isn’t for dirty clothes? Remind him to eat healthier? Well ladies, save your voice. The Jenda Voice Calendar will record your appointments, messages, reminders, and all of your various daily nagging.

All you do is select the date, press record then say stuff like “Fix that damn deck today or else”. The calendar’s flashing “Today” button will alert others about the day’s schedule. It’s unclear if the nagging will play back on that day, or if the button just flashes.

Do you really need a dog translator? I can do the translating for you right now. Dogs are simple creatures, who only say a few things with their barks. Stuff like, “Holy crap, are you gonna take me for a walk or am I gonna poop in your shoe again?” or “Hey. Guy who kidnapped me as a puppy, do you plan on feeding me that garbage you call food anytime soon?”

But if you don’t want to take my word for it, then check out this gadget. TakaraTomy may have developed the world’s first dog translator. Just “place the bark-sensor collar around your pup’s neck, then grab the wireless controller and the Bowlingual Voice will speak on your dog’s behalf.”

Novelty GPS products are few and far between. Sure, we have the Knight Rider GPS, but do you really want to be re-living all of those car chase scenes while behind the wheel? Probably not a good idea if you are easily convinced that your car has rocket boosters.

So how should the average guy use GPS? I’m glad you asked. The official Homer Simpson voice skin for the TomTom GPS of course. It features Homer’s voice saying things like “Take the third right. We might find an ice cream truck! Mmm…ice cream.”

This is the best lie detector ever. I mean, who better to tell you if someone is lying than the devil himself right? Who knew that the devil’s nose grows like Pinocchio with each lie? The Spion Portable Lie Detector uses voice tension (and the cartoon devil) to indicate true or false answers.

This thing is bound to be totally accurate. Never before has a company used Satan/Pinocchio technology to gauge truthiness. The nose knows. Only $79.95.

If you liked the idea of being able to use your new kindle to listen to the books you buy, too bad. Even though you paid for the ‘text-to-speech’ feature, Amazon has caved in to the Authors Guild and authors, who will now have the right to block the audio feature being used on their books. Amazon has bowed to pressure from the Authors Guild and will allow authors and publishers to disable the controversial text-to-speech feature on its Kindle e-reader.

Insiders say the move by Amazon was intended to smooth relations with authors, not avoid any lawsuits.

If you have been talking to your remote lately, you’ve probably noticed that it doesn’t listen to you. Which is annoying. The Amulet Remote is like a girlfriend/bartender/therapist in that it will actually listen to your non-stop drivel and won’t judge you for the maniac you undoubtedly are.

It was designed specifically for Vista Media Center but is probably adaptable to other setups. It’s essentially a voice-activated controller that lets users record a series, watch a recorded show, skip to a new playlist or queue up a photo slideshow just by talking to it. The built-in microphone is there for you in good times and bad. During the good times you’ll talk sweet to it. During the bad you’ll yell at that $%@# and tell it that it better record your show or else. Check out a video below.

We sure got a ton of nerd rage regarding that Lego safe we posted last night. If you find the Lego safe to be not safe enough, maybe this safe is more up your alley. With the Voice-Activated Biometric Safe, you can be sure that your nerd-stuff (Like that valuable signed William Shatner album) stays safe and sound.

It will only open with a voice command! Once the proper sound waves of your voice are heard, the door will open automatically. If someone tries and fails, the alarm will sound. Of course, someone will just record your voice and can probably get in that way. It’s only $24.99 and takes three AA batteries.

Anybody who has ever found themselves stranded and in need of a jump on a freezing day can appreciate this device. It’s like having a handy man with you. Many of us have jumper cables but don’t have any idea how to use them properly. The device can talk you through the whole jump-starting process and get you back on the road as quick as possible.

It features an onboard air compressor to pump up flat tires and can also serve as an substitute for a power generator, giving you 340 watts of continuous AC with a 450w peak. That’s plenty to run your laptop or even a small TV. If that isn’t enough, it has a USB port to charge your gadgets. For $150, you’ll feel pretty secure with this in your trunk.

Here’s something you don’t see everyday. A GPS device without a screen from French company Kapsys. It seems at first like a horrible idea, but speech can be just as powerful. It’s a one-of-a-kind mini portable GPS device with a voice recognition interface.

It’s designed mainly for pedestrians who need directions, and also includes a text-to-speech feature. It might also help you keep your eyes on the road. TeleAtlas will offer the map information, while Kapsys provides still more city-related information on their website. Features a SiRF Star III GPS receiver, Bluetooth, MP3 player, FM Radio and hands-free capability. As far as storage it has 4GB of internal memory. Expect it around mid-September for 150 Euros.

If having all of that music at your fingertips isn’t enough for you and you want a still easier way to access your music, this might be just the thing. The Muso is a gadget that plugs into the iPod, and gives you voice control.

It will synchronize with your iTunes library on the first use, without any training. It understands requests like “Play some Beatles”, “Give me Rap”, or even “Play me something like the last song”. It costs $159, and the battery lasts for 10 hours, which is plenty of time for you to have talked yourself hoarse, much to the dismay of those around you.

Some days, there’s only so much you can type without going insane. Well, here’s something that should help with your keyboard fatigue. It’s something between an email and a phone call.

The Email Voice Sender will instantly send recorded voice messages to recipients through email and you don’t have to type a thing. Just install the software on your computer and you’re ready to go. It sells for $39.98.

Do you ever have the urge to mess with your friends, but don’t, because your voice would give you away? Well, check this out. With the help of this simple and cheap device, you’ll be able to make a phone call without being recognized. It works just like other hands-free headsets. Just plug it into your cellphone, and you are good to go.

One drawback is that there aren’t many voice options. The device comes loaded with five voice modes, a robot voice, an old man for when you want to tell hippies to get off your lawn, a child, and a duck for when you want to do your own rendition of Disco Duck in someone’s ear. I’m not sure how long the fun would last, but the price is $29.99.

Another robot with the Stormtrooper color scheme. Be scared. Be very scared. The ApriPoko robot will store all your remote control’s commands. After storing the remote’s commands, it will then respond to your voice. So say goodbye to your remote.

But first you’ll have to train ApriPoko like some Pokemon. He is smart enough to capture the infra-red beams, each time one passes it and it will ask you what has just happened? When you give it the information, the robot will store the command and also the infra-red signal details, which can be used later.