Conventional CPR training is about to get an overhaul with the use of PCs and the Wii. Currently it’s a concept technology and it has been under development by the University of Alabama at Birmingham since the beginning of this year.

The idea is that when you push on ResusciAnne’s chest, the motion controlled joystick interprets it as correct or incorrect chest compressions and lets you know. A working prototype was created last Spring, and the American Heart Association has pledged $50,000 in grant money. The Wii CPR software could be available for download as early as this Fall. It would be an open source code so the user can program it to their own specifications.

If you’ve been journeying far and wide across the interwebz, you may already know what this vehicle is all about. We covered it last July and it’s making the rounds again. If you haven’t seen it, here’s a refresher. This isn’t the Amish discovering Hot Rods, it trains horses.

And we still think Batman may have had something to do with it. I mean, look at the design. Bruce Wayne has his hands in everything. Why not race horses? It allows trainers to be close to the animals while training them and monitoring their vital signs. It has very precise and controlled speeds ranging from walking to 60kph.

Now here’s an entertaining 8 minute video that will have you thanking god you didn’t work for the big N in 1991. I can’t imagine being made to actually watch this stuff because it was my job. It’s a customer service training video that shows employees how to handle all kinds of customers who want to return merchandise and also happen to be stereotypes.

You’ll see a bald dude try to get his money back for an NES that’s encrusted all over with some sort of mega-funk that makes it stick to the employee’s hands, a nerd that can’t work a gameboy and some nice lady who learns how to plug the controller into port 1 and likes to bake pies as thank you currency.

So you wanna swim like Michael Phelps, but your pool isn’t exactly Olympic size. That’s where the Home Swimmer comes in handy. It’s like a treadmill for the pool. It will keep you in place so you can feel like your pool has no boundaries, which will give you a great workout and let you practice for the gold at the same time.

Looks like it’s pretty simple to use. Just attach any flabby person to the tether, suspend a Big Mac two feet in front of him and the fun begins. It’s only $89.99. I suppose you could just, you know, swim around on your own, but I guess some people need to be tethered to get fit.

For those who want to train their fish to do all kinds of un-fish-like stuff, check out this R2 Fish School Training Kit that’s got nothing to do with R2-D2. I’m guessing it’s for those who want to enter there fish in the fish Olympics. It was created by noted fish-training expert, Dr. Dean Pomerleau and the R2 Solutions team.

The kit employs basic marine mammal training techniques. Basically if you promise them food, they’ll do all kinds of tricks. Who knew? It’s like the whole What Would You Do For A Klondike Bar?, but with fish. Your little pets will learn how to limbo, slalom, fetch, play basketball, jump through hoops, and more. If the fish Olympics don’t exist yet, they will soon and I’ll be right there betting on guppies playing Basketball. At least until various steroids scandals hit. $39.95 gets you into the shady world of fish training.

Products that are designed to help you learn how to use the toilet are funny. Mostly because you should know how to use the toilet by now. Potty Monkey is awesome. This 15-inch tall stuffed monkey comes complete with a pair of diapers, a pair of underwear and his toilet. An electronic timer is buried somewhere in his rectum body and can be set at intervals of 30 or 90 minutes. When the clock runs out, the monkey will tell you he needs to go potty. When you place him on the toilet he won’t shut up about it. He’ll tell you how much better he feels, and will even sing a version of ‘Twinkle Twinkle Little Star’, except his version is all about dukey and yule-logs. Don’t think you can just ignore him like a bad parent either.

If you do, he will just plead more. “I really need to go potty! Let’s go potty!!” Ignore him again, and he says, “Hey, take me to the potty now or I’ll have an accident!” After that, “Oh no! I had an accident! Please take me to the potty next time.” No…I will not take you to the potty. You are not my son. You are a bad monkey who somehow ended up in my home and feels free to crap himself at the drop of a hat.