Check out this insane device that calls itself a gadget. USB hubs are great and all, but a Rotary phone USB hub? It’s the kind of thing you give a tech blogger at the end of his career, to keep him from drooling all over the nursing home, just like you used to give those toy rotary phones to kids. And even then it’s not much of a laugh unless they try to make a call with it. It’s not something you want on your desk. Turning the dial opens and closes the hubs, which I guess is kinda cool, should someone hate you enough to gift you one. Available for $15.

Alright, so this is only cool to those who are easily amused and you know who you are. If this was your new phone, then you’d have to call your friends and tell them, “Dude I’m calling from a Bud bottle.” And of course hilarity would ensue. The best part is if you ever have a brawl in your living room, you can hit somebody on the head with your phone and hopefully it won’t leave you holding only shards and the neck of the bottle. Dial the number, then knock that other drunk bastard out just as his mom answers and you tell her to pick his sorry ass up. Yeah this phone is made for drunken fun, frat parties, and of course it’s perfect white trash decor.

Rotary dial phones seem to be making a comeback, at least in gadgets if not actual phones. First there was the rotary dial app for iPhone. Now we have the Zihotch Retro Phone Watch, which is a pretty unique watch.

So how do you tell what time it is? You need to make a phone call to find out. Just dial 117 and the you’ll get the time from a recorded voice. Dial the wrong number and you get, “We are sorry, the number you have dialed is not in service. Please check and call again.” It can also be used as an alarm. It can be yours for $79.99.