The R2-D2 talking money box is a great way to save up for all of that Star Wars gear you want to buy. But R2-D2 doesn’t talk, so really you are just getting a bunch of beeps and boops that you will need Luke to translate.

It’s just $34. Lucas has gotten rich off of you buying all of this R2 gear, so saving money is the least this little droid can help you to do.

The Flemish. If anyone can get a tree to talk to the world, it’s them. This talking tree was found in Brussels. This collaboration between EOS Magazine and Happiness Brussels has a 100 year old tree outfitted with a dust meter, ozone meter, light meter, weather station, webcam and microphone. They all report back to Twitter, Flickr, Soundlcoud, and Facebook, as well as talking-tree.com.

This is convenient because the last time a tree talked to you it involved psychoactive drugs and purple bunnies. This has got to be better, right? Video below.

When you were a kid, your mother would tell you to slow down when you were eating too fast. Thankfully, as an adult you no longer have to put up with that. Let me introduce you to your mother, the plate. A plate that will nag you and tell you to slow down.

It’s called a Mandometer and it weighs the food on your plate, and times you, even verbally reprimanding you when you eat too quickly. A study claims that the Mandometer reduced the Body Mass Index (BMI) of test subjects by 2.1% over 18 months.

Who has time to learn a new language? Most of the time visits to foreign countries mean just a short stay, so why bother? We’ll the Trinvo talking translator lets you translate your speech into 12 languages.

No matter what you want to say, you should be covered. Whether you need to find a bathroom or some good food. The dictionary holds over 2,500 words and 750 common phrases in all 12 languages. That should help you avoid laughter from the locals as you screw up their language.

In many states you aren’t supposed to hold a cell phone while driving. It’s the law. I once saw a teenage girl talking on her phone while driving a pick up truck, run straight into a parked car. There was nothing else around her for miles. She was simply distracted and didn’t have her focus on driving. This VR3 Bluetooth Steering Wheel Console might help those who have trouble doing two things at once.

It gives you hands free wireless chatting directly in front of you, with a design that keeps your hands on the wheel for safety. Sure, it’s ugly as hell, but so is an ambulance ride or a mangled corpse. It’s only $99.99.

Transformers fans will love this four port USB hub in the shape of Optimus Prime’s head. It’s like you decapitated the lead transformer and have a talking trophy on your desk. Like the All Spark version, it spews classic phrases like “Autobots, transform and roll out!”, “This is Optimus Prime – do you read me?” and “It’s time to stomp some Decepticons!” when you connect a USB gadget.

It has an on/off switch for the voice, so when you get sick of it, you won’t have to pull your hair out. It will cost you $34.99. Now you have something to keep you company until the sequel comes out.

When you have a nasty cold and are sneezing, the last thing you need is some joker mocking you. That’s exactly what this talking tissue box does. Instead of being neutral and silent while you cough and retch and sneeze, this little jackass mocks you by either coughing or sneezing each time you reach out for a tissue.

Cute? No F-in way. You’ll want to punch it in it’s face and wonder why you bought it for $19.99 in the first place. It takes 2 AA batteries to perform it’s feats of annoying.

I’m not sure what it is about lips this week. This is the second bizarre device we’ve found this week that had a pair of lips attached. The first was the kiss phone. The Lips Hands Free Phone Kit is a bit different. This is for those who might want a video phone but can’t afford it. They believe that this hands-free calling kit might be an acceptable compromise.

It clips onto any land line or mobile phone and adds hands-free speakerphone capabilities, but the best part is that it also includes a pair of animated lips that move in sync with the other person talking. No matter who you are talking to from then on, it will always seem that you are talking with a weird female duck-bot thing that mimics the voices of those you know and love. All for the low of price of $18.