Myself, I don’t feel the need to spend more than about $35 on a pair of shoes. However, if you are into cutting edge sneakers and the whole tech/foot experience, maybe a pair of VectraSense Technologies’ new $700 Verb for Shoes will get you excited about putting these in the closet.

For the $700 price tag, you will have shoes worthy of the Bionic Man himself. They feature an embedded computer with “Auto Comfort”, which means that they automatically adjust to the wearer’s feet, becoming firmer or more cushioned based on movement. They also feature “Contact Sharing,” which allows them to trade information with other smart shoes in the area.(Hey, what up? You stink as bad as I do? Damn this fool got nasty feet!) Through a wireless link, users can even sync information between their shoes and a PC. At $700, they better put themselves away when you remove them too.

These sneakers are fully functional hot spot finders. As you walk around town, an integrated display will let you know what the signal strength is on hot spots around you. The wearable Wi-Fi sneakers are named A Step in the Right Direction and were designed by mstrpln and Ubiq boutique.

The ASRD sneaker has an integrated wireless internet detection unit embedded under the flap of the left shoe. When the pressure sensitive insole is activated, the device scans the surrounding area for Wi-Fi signals and displays the result through LEDs so you can see it. Sure, geeks are going to love these, but aren’t there more convenient ways to find hot spots? Better yet, instead of trying to find hot spots with your shoes, maybe you should be trying to score with the ladies, Poindexter.

Ok. This one is pretty self-evident. It’s a bike that has had it’s wheels replaced with shoes. Yeah…Ok…See, this is what happens during a night of drugs and bike building. I like it, but at the same time, I really want this guy to turn the bike upside down, crank the pedals, and start kicking his own ass. Video below.

We first told you about this bizarre combo in early January on our sister site Poptherapy. It should be noted that this hybrid of powder flavored drink aka liquid crack, combined with sneaker is completely unnatural and I am now more convinced then ever that the apocalypse is among us.

Do you really want your feet to smell like various Kool-Aid flavors? If you wear them in the rain, will you create magical Kool-Aid puddles as you walk? I have no idea. I’m still too perplexed by the whole thing. I kinda wish the Kool-Aid guy would crash through my wall so I could ask him about this. Then I would sue that fat wet bastard for all his sneaker money. He broke my wall!