It’s not all abducting cows and humans. Aliens love music on outdated media. This may be because UFOs are only outfitted with Cd players or it may be that UFOs actually use CDs for fuel. Who can say?

But get yourself one of these decoy alien CD racks and it will keep your CDs safe. Any thieving grey bastard who aims to steal your tunes will think another of his kind has gotten there first and head to the next house. This keeps your tunes safe and anal probes far away from you.

The Roswell the Alien Wall Plaque has a few different uses. For one, it makes it look like you caught one and imprisoned it in your wall. Which is good because if a real alien shows up one night to abduct you for study, he’ll see this on your wall and hightail it out of there. Plus, he’ll tell his friends and thus you will be safe.

It’s also the sort of thing that comes in handy for scaring away unwanted house guests who like to spend the night. Just put this up in your guest room and no one will want to sleep over. It comes in three pieces: a head and two hands, so you can move them about to create the look that you want.