Certain items have “mid-life crisis” and “cranky old fart with money” written all over them. This is one such item. The F1 Lithium is the latest over the top golf accessory for those who want to prowl the golf course in style. It collapses to a nice handy size, which is why this foldable caddy is named F1. F1 stands for ‘the folding one’.

It uses a custom made Li-Ion battery that’s capable of giving you enough energy for more than 36 holes of golf. An LCD screen at the rear will tell you how much battery life remains. It will cost you $5,000. But seriously, if you’re going to buy this, you can certainly upgrade the whole plaid look you have going on. Buy a more practical golf accessory like this.

We all know that Golf is a game for old men with weak bladders and young men who drink too much. It all adds up to a long day and alot of peeing in the rough. But if you want to be lazy about it, why bother leaving the green at all? Urologist Floyd Seskin went above and beyond the call of urine duty by making this possible. How you ask? It’s simple.

Just place a towel over your stuff and unscrew the cap of this club that looks like a 7-iron, and relieve yourself as fast as you can, so you don’t get caught. It will hold up to a half liter. Now, I’ve never measured my own homebrew so I have no idea how much to expect. I just know that it would suck to get a bunch of sprayback all over me. The upside of this fake iron is that it feels good to relieve yourself. The downside is that to everyone else it just looks like you’re going to town on a 7 iron behind a towel.

I’m no Golfer, but this thing looks like it would come in very handy. The Callaway I-MIX system basically allows you to swap out different shafts and clubheads, letting you mix and match parts for your golf club so that you can more perfectly match the conditions of the course that you are playing.

You can begin with either a FT-5 or FT-I clubhead. After that you can choose from over 70 shafts from seven manufacturers. It’s up to you to make the perfect club. Included tool secures the shaft to the clubhead and supposedly you can do it in under 30 seconds. (If you’re the impatient type) You only have yourself to blame if your game sucks. You created the club.

If you like the Full Swing Golf simulator, but don’t want to tear up your home, this is the way to go. All you need is a yard large enough to park this eyesore in. Like other simulators, it uses a projection screen along with a motion sensors that will detect the motion and speed of the ball. That info is then put on screen and you can watch the result on a 3D course.

Apparently, it only works with woods and irons, so you’ll still suck at putting. They say that the inflatable structure is weatherproof so you could even play in nasty weather. Your neighbors will probably wonder why you vanish inside an inflatable house every afternoon. Nosy bastards.

This is probably not the best mouse to use gaming-wise. But Golf fans will have fun hitting a tiny ball in the hole either with the mouse that resembles a squished golfball or included putter. It even comes with the mousepad, looking like the green, and a flag.

Great for getting some game play in on those rainy days where you would otherwise get hit by lightning. The mouse, not content with being an ordinary flattened ball, will also light up in several colors. No word on price, but I’m guessing it won’t cost very much, since it won’t actually improve your skill.

This thing looks like a Stormtrooper that displeased Darth Vader and got stomped on with the Force. It’s actually part of the official Star Wars Golf gear. That’s right, now you can proclaim your love for a galaxy far far away on the Golf course. Does this product belong in the rejected Star Wars pile? You be the judge.

You have a choice of Stormtrooper white or Darth Vader black. They’re made in Japan and apparently the quality is good. They should go on sale soon for about $500. With this gear AND the Force, you will rule the green. But always be on the lookout for Ewoks, the deadliest enemy the Empire has ever known.(And not bad golfers themselves.)

Like golf? Want a simulator that absolutely kicks ass? Got $55,000? Well, to quote Meatloaf, “Two out of three ain’t bad”. But if you do have 55 grand to burn, you might want to pick up this golf simulator called Full Swing Golf. Oh, you’ll also need a spare 20 x 13 x 10.5 foot room to park it in.

Once you’ve overcome those hurdles, you can practice your golfing skills from the comfort of your own home. The huge screen is actually powered by a windows based PC which will let you play on golf courses from around the world at the touch of a button. The picture is projected on the large screen and you basically hit balls onto it. Two 360 degree curtains of infra-red beams emit 60000 pulses per second and will track the trajectory, speed and other details of the ball. Check out a video after the jump.