Humanity has accomplished some amazing things by combining virtual reality with plain ole reality. This is not one of those things. This is something designed to give randy nerds a few cheap thrills. The idea is that if you can’t find a girlfriend, Alice will take a shot at being the object of your affections.

It’s called “Dennou Figure ARis”, or “Cyber Figure Alice” in plain English. Buyers get the AR software, 2 cybersticks and 2 cybercubes. Place one of the cubes in front of the computer, point your webcam at it and the screen will display a 3D image of Alice standing on top of the cube. Here’s where your cybersticks come in handy. You’ll use them to touch, caress, fondle and peep at your new lady. Fear not, you can of course even undress Alice and change her clothes.

Listen, if your entire house is decked out in Hello Kitty items, that’s your business. But it affects me too. Someone please think about the men. The innocent, unsuspecting men… Must all things lead to Pink Upchuck heaven? I think the main problem I have with it is that in about 2000 years, no one is gonna know who the hell Hello Kitty is, but they will be digging this stuff up and thinking we worship a pink feline goddess. Hmmm. I guess you kind of do, which is why I’m writing this. Okay, forget I said anything. I’ll try to tell you about your new TV without gagging.

It’s the TL19TX1 from Uniden. It’s a 19-Inch TV with a resolution of 1440×810, and a contrast ratio of 1,000:1, brightness of 300cd/m², and response time of 5ms.
It also features a 1Seg Tuner, built-in speakers (3Wx2), and HDMI Interface. You can get it in two colors : Black & White and the price is 415€.

What’s a nerd to do when one day you wake up and realize that there’s no woman in your life and there likely never will be? You create your own woman, that’s what! One who will carry your PC on her back like Luke carrying Yoda.

If that’s not creepy enough, make sure you take plenty of pictures of the project, and I mean planty, detailing every stage of it’s construction and adding to the overall flavor of desperation and geek excitement. That’s what Katsuya Matsumura did. His gal is party in the front and PC in the back. Say what you will about a perv and his PC, you don’t have one.

Apparently cell phone kissing is a hot activity in Japan. I had no idea. The kiss phone makes it easier to kiss your loved one from a distance via mobile. This isn’t just video and making loud smoochie sounds either, the kiss phone from PROinvention can detect the intensity of the kiss. It senses not only the pressure you use, but also the heat of your lips and how hard you press or suck. (I’d say you suck pretty hard if you buy this phone)

Warning: Creepy territory ahead. Your partner, who also obviously has a Kiss Phone, just presses their lips against the fake plastic mouth of the phone…and they will feel the partner’s simulated mouth on theirs. Yes, it has now come to sticking your mouth on plastic objects. If you like, you can also leave kisses on the answering machine, and replay them over and over, until your lips hurt.