Since everyone is using the Wii these days, I guess it was inevitable that we could get house calls from Dr. Mario. Nintendo Japan has announced a new Wii “Check-Up” channel that is scheduled for an April launch. The system was developed with the help of Hitachi, NEC, and Panasonic, with a health insurance company providing 2-way communication between users and health professionals who will give you “healthy guidance”.

Let’s face it, you could use some of that after playing video games all day. Apparently it will work in conjunction with Wii Fit and the Balance Board. You can also use NEC’s mobile phone health platform.

I’m sure you have all gotten nice and slim using the Wii Fit, which is good, because much like a Thanksgiving turkey in September, Nintendo now has a plan to fatten you up. Probably so you’ll be more inclined to buy Wii Fit 2 and work it all off again. Beginning this spring, Nintendo will intro the Food Delivery Channel in Japan, just like how TiVo users can order Pizza Hut.

Wii users will be able to place orders from Demae-can.com where they can buy sushi, hamburgers and all kinds of stuff fit for a dinner in front of the Wii. It goes further then just food ordering though. You order the food and then if you like, your Wii will set the mood music. It can even pick a meal and have it sent to you randomly.

By now you’re well aware of the upcoming Nintendo Wii Speak peripheral. It’s a microphone that lets you communicate with other Wii users online. Some of you have eagerly waited for it. Ars Technica discovered that it comes with a 16 character code to download the “Wii Speak” channel. Thing is, it’s a one time use code. You can not replace it if lost.

That’s right, you can NEVER sell it, NEVER give it away and NEVER use it on another Wii Console other than the one it was downloaded on. I hear ya. It sucks. I consider it a scam on Nintendo’s part. I for one won’t be buying this useless turd. Nintendo isn’t going to tell me what I can do with hardware I purchase. I’m gonna get a friend to buy it and download onto my system. Then I’ll act dumb when it doesn’t work on theirs later.

Hackers will get a machine to do all kinds of things that it should do, but doesn’t. Correcting the oversights of those damn lazy companies. We want things the way we want them. That’s why some Wii coders have made it so the Wii can have DVD playback.

It’s done by installing a hidden channel on the console, which gives it a DVD access library so you can watch all your favorite dvds with the MPlayer application, an open source media player. The install file works on both modded and unmodded Wiis. They are apparently experimenting with playing media from SD cards as well. Now you’ll be able to watch any DVD you want one last time before Blu-Ray creeps into your life.

If you want a remote that says, “Freeze or I’ll turn your planet to rubble.”, or “Flash Gordon refuses to watch this crap any longer.” then this is for you.

Ray guns were a staple of Sci-Fi from the 40’s through the 60’s, isn’t it about time you changed channels with one? Damn straight. Cuz geeks are all about pretend, even when they’re watching some other people pretending to cruise through space on T.V. The price won’t zap you at only $18, but you’ll need to wait until August 16th when it’s available. This is great for fighting robots.

Japan gets all the cool stuff right? Well, they just got more. Users in Japan now have access to a new channel. Not all of the details are known yet, but from what we can gather, with the TV Guide Channel, users can surf through shows on the EPG, share their favorites, use demographic data to see how popular a program is and even receive an alert 30 minutes prior to a show’s start time.

The main thing is, the ability to use your Wiimote as a television remote via the sensor bar. It will control all the usual functions like volume, switching channels. Jealous? Of course you are. We will just have to wait and see if we ever get anything like it here.