Relaxation, music and boobs. What more do you want? Not all of us have an available bosom in our lives though. Whether your girlfriend is away or you just don’t have one, just rest your head on iBoobs and all will be right with the world.

It’s a boob inspired relaxation system that features soft padding with a velvet-type material, with nipples covering the speakers, (Not pictured) and it has a headphone jack wire with volume control to connect your MP3 player, mobile phone, computer, or TV. It also runs on batteries.

John Lennon said that happiness is a warm gun. While a nerd will tell you that happiness can be found in the warm touch of a boob mouse on a quiet evening after the comic books have all been read and his acne has been quietly put to bed under a blanket of clearasil.

A torso mouse can bring a nerd joy, sure. But only a true boob mouse and mouse pad can turn him from a boy into a man…child. The price is $38. Click away and dream my friend. Make comments like, “Oh, it must be chilly in here.” then laugh like Urkel and hide it from your mom. Say, she’s got some pretty wide hips there.