Man, my underpants are really unstable. You zip your pants up wrong or tighten your belt too much and bam, everything freezes up and I get the Blue Screen of Death on my belt buckle. Control-Alt-Delete doesn’t seem to work, which really sucks because it takes a while to boot up my junk again.

BSOD humor is apparently alive and well and invading belts. You get a metal buckle with clam style closure, a cotton/acrylic blend of fabric for the belt and an image of the Blue Screen of Death.

It ain’t easy getting by in these tough economic times. That’s why Sonic Design, a Brooklyn based company, has developed the Tough Times Belt Puncher for the tough times we are all enduring due to the credit crunch.

If you’re feeling squeezed by the current economic climate and are forced to go on a recession diet, (Usually consisting of Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches or worse SPAM) this belt is for you. It uses a 3-disc adjustment mechanism allowing the user to dial in their annual net income and estimated cost of living. The hole punch is positioned an appropriate distance from the last hole according to the economic situation and personal needs of the user.

The Kyocera NS01 is not the best and most powerful phone available right now, but what it lacks in power, it makes up for in cutting edge geek fashion. The handset features an integrated belt, so it will hold up your pants while taking a call.

The NS01 features a 2.8 QVGA Screen, a 1.97MP camera, and e-wallet. Hey, at least you won’t lose your phone if it’s attached to your pants. There isn’t a ton of info, but I’m assuming it can detach easily while it is acting as a belt, because otherwise things could get comical real quick. Like if your friend needs to use your phone in an emergency, you would want to be able to quickly detach it. Because one guy on his knees, talking to someone in your crotch area in public doesn’t look good. It also doesn’t look good if you walk around hunched over talking to your own belt buckle as you try to pull it closer to no avail.

If you absolutely have to keep your pants up, and I recommend that you do so that you don’t get acquainted with police, these video game belt buckles are the best way to do it. Each one is handmade by artist Natalie Hutcheson and is full of famous retro video game action, such as Donkey Kong, Ms. Pac-Man and more.

They’re made with brass-toned metal, inlaid with sparkling metallic game graphics, then coated with a durable industrial epoxy finish. These are probably the coolest belt buckles I’ve seen in my entire geek life. And they’re only $18 each. Now, if someone would just create an LED Pac-Man belt that can zip around my waist chasing ghosts, my life would be complete.

It aint easy defending Gotham. And if super heroes existed in the real world, it would lead to some serious drinking. I mean these guys you’re doing battle with are demented. At the end of the night you just want a brew or four. This thing will hold a six-pack.

So after you park the batmobile and tuck Robin in, swap one utility belt for another and just forget your troubles. Alfred will wipe the drool from your chin and put you to bed after you pass out.

The pink angel of the apocalypse is at it again, still bent on world domination and bending young women to it’s will. But I have to say, if Hello Kitty is trying to win me over with the above pic, I’m nearly there, dorky belt and all. That’s because at first glance this device seems to rid well shaped women of their clothes, put a pink Wiimote in their hand and give her protective padding for the workout I have in mind. I’m obviously under the Kitty’s influence, so let’s move on.

This is the Hello Kitty Slender Shaper and claims to burn off fat from your midsection with a shaking action. And, as mentioned, comes with a Wiimote of sorts, so you can shake your groove thing faster or slower with just the push of a button. The entire package, with carrying case will cost about $127.52.