Construction sites are dangerous. That’s why we have hard-hats. I can’t think of a worse place to be drinking on the job. But this Bottle-opener hammer from Harbor Freight makes it okay to have a cold one, whether you’re staggering on scaffolding or nailing your buddy’s hand to a wall.

Don’t worry about the job. It will get done when it gets done. Bill’s head will heal from that fall and Foreman Mike didn’t really need that leg anyway. Work is so much more adventurous when the booze flows.

We’ve seen tons of bottle openers around here, but this one is perhaps the manliest way to open a bottle ever. Men know two things. Opening bottles and working with tools. And since I’m a man I like to think I know a little something about both.

Craftsman’s Cap Wrench Bottle Opener is basically a opener that acts as a fulcrum and weighs a solid 0.64 lbs. It’s made from solid steel. If your buddies see you opening a beer with this thing, they are gonna know who the alpha dog is. Right tool for the right job.

Lost beer is a serious problem. The longer it remains lost, the warmer it gets and the less drunk you are. Plus, the drunker you get, the easier it is to lose your beer. This here Beer Pager will let you know where your beer is at all times and will emit a belching sound from up to 60 feet away through walls.

The Beer Pager is available now for just under $20 and will stop beer loss in it’s tracks. Because as long as you have beer, everything is right with the world.

Forget drunk driving. The Beer Trike drives your drinks. It is essentially a mobile pub. And perhaps one of mankind’s finest inventions. It could be as big as the ice cream truck, only for adults. The beer trike was built for the British Biker Build-Off.

You have your usual bike along with a sidecar, and a completely operational mobile bar. It also sports air suspension on all three wheels. The only concern is how to keep all of that beer cold. If I could, I would buy this and travel the country filling mugs everywhere and becoming a legend.

What are the two greatest things ever? Games and booze that’s what. What you are looking at is man’s best friend and I’m not talking about a dog. The Arkeg is an arcade game with a keg built in. It holds a 5-gallon keg and a PC that comes pre-loaded with 104 classic games.

Drink up my friends until up is down and down is up on that joystick. You’ll be blitzed by the light of a 24-inch screen, with a 2.1 sound system and a powered sub, along with two arcade controllers and a trackball.

The Portable Tap Dispenser is a backpack with a dispensing tap that holds whatever brew you choose. It keeps the party firmly on your back. It also has a cupholder. Not since ghostbusters have backpacks been so cool. I don’t know about you, but I would rather be drinking than catching ghosts. Still, don’t cross the streams, that would be bad.

We don’t know what the capacity is, but it looks big enough to get you good and drunk. Maybe then you’ll see ghosts and try to catch them with beer. It will cost you $35.

The future of beer is in a box thanks to some inside-of-the-box thinking. The $20, 1.5-gallon boxes of beer are designed for beer drinkers who prefer their beer from the tap but also don’t mind if that tap is a box. Currently they are testing boxes of Miller Lite and Coors Lite in select cities and they plan to expand it nationwide this football season.

In case you were wondering, 1.5 gallons equals 16 bottles. So you’ll be paying $1.25 per bottle, which is more expensive than buying a 12-pack of bottles. Hey, you have to pay for innovation.

As men, we really only need a few things to be happy. Two to be exact. Food and beer. But it isn’t always easy to juggle them both. Now, thankfully you can carry both in one hand thanks to the Go Plate. A Pack of 42 will cost you $49.

They let you hold your beer and food in one hand, while your other hand is free to text, smoke, twitter, whatever. It’s a plate that fits over your bottle, cup or can. When you want a drink, just lift the plate off. Don’t be that guy who goes to take a sip and dumps all of your food all over yourself.

This electronic change counting bank makes sure that you always have money for beer. Because in these tough times, beer money too often goes toward other frivolous things like a “mortgage”, or a “college fund”. Make sure that doesn’t happen to your beer money by making daily deposits.

It will count and tally up your total savings, but sadly doesn’t translate that into number of beers saved. It also won’t convert the change into cash, so you’ll be known as “that guy who always pays in pennies”.

Drink to your Viking Gods and celebrate life with this Viking Horn Beer Bong. Praise Odin as you take beer in through the horn and pass vomit out as you burn and pillage your liver.

It has multiple uses too. Are you one of those 70 year olds that still loves to party? Drink up then hold it to your ear so you can hear all the goings on around you. This product is begging to be endorsed by Flavor Flav and marketed with a Viking helmet.

The Russian Roulette Beer Bong turns drinking into a game of chance. Where the Alcohol Shot Gun holds just one ounce, this wheel/barrel thing holds 2 liters. I say combine the two for a Dirty Harry type spin the bottle game.

Just spin the roulette wheel and pull out a bottle. If you are the unlucky one, you’ll have to chug 2 liters of beer. The others are free to laugh until it’s their turn. All of your collective puke should make the bottle spin pretty wildly. Or it might just appear to be spinning faster from your position on the floor.

Beer fueling cars? Cars now competing for beer that you should be guzzling? Yep. And your car won’t get a beer gut or wake up next to Quasimodo the next morning. Don’t sweat it though, we’re talking leftovers. Sierra Nevada has purchased a MicroFueler, which produces ethanol from water, sugar and yeast. As you probably know from Beer 101, yeast is a major byproduct of beer fermentation. So they can now make fuel out of beer leftovers.

It’s a great Earth friendly way to recycle waste. And it’s nice to see a company being responsible and doing something good. Plus their cars get to drink beer. How cool is that? Your job doesn’t put beer in your car.

There’s a new sheriff in town, and he’s serving up booze. The Shots Gun Drink Dispenser will only cost you about $22 and it even comes with a holster. It’s a gun that shoots booze. What could be better? It will let you impress your friends as you shoot up some drinks and shoot off your mouth. Though it may be a small weapon, it packs a powerful punch.

I know what you’re thinking. Did he fire six shots, or…only five? Do you feel lucky punk? Do ya? Then have another drink. It will fit on any bottle of liquor. Simply put the holster on your bottle, begin pumping the pump-action lever and you’ll be shooting more rounds then Ron Jeremy during production hours.

It’s beginning to look a lot like a redneck Christmas…I mean how much do you have to drink during a typical day, to say to yourself, “I need that there hat!”. If you see nothing odd about this bottle opener hat, then chances are pretty good that you attend Nascar races while simultaneously courting your sister. In case it’s not obvious, the Guinness Bottle Opener Baseball Cap has a metal hook on the brim to tear off caps, and it’s officially licensed by the beer company and all.

The cap sells for $25, which isn’t too bad if you absolutely must have it. But you’re probably thinking that your teeth have done the job thus far, and they can probably open another couple hundred beers. Cuz that $25 should really go toward brew.

The problem with having your beer tap and your TV seperate is that sooner or later you’re going to have to get up off your ass and get a beer. That means missing like 2 seconds of TV time. Something important might happen during that time. With this awesme innovation, you won’t ever have to miss anything again while getting a beer. It’s the v-POD beer dispenser with LCD screen from the house of MicroMatic.

They are offered in stainless steel and brass double column style Tower with 6 and 4 faucets respectively. The dispensers come with a built-in 10-inch LCD screen, remotely mounted DiGi viewer and stereo speakers. What else do you need? The brass finished v-POD “T” Tower beer dispenser will cost you $3,380. The stainless steel version sells for $3,050.