This is the kind of phone that will appeal to two types. Women who have closets full of way too expensive shoes, and those who have a foot fetish. Of course they made it pink. Women love pink right? Just like they love high heel shoes. No doubt made by a man, but pink enough for a woman. You freaky shoe/foot fetishists will enjoy caressing it and rubbing it all over your face, even licking it’s length. Which is disturbing to the rest of us, so please stop. But if you must, the price is $22. Just realize that pink shoe phones are not acceptable to society.

If you’re a company that is still making landline phones, you have to come up with something that’s gonna make people want them. Like mimicking the iPhone for instance. Could be coincidence. Maybe. The OpenFrame Platform from OpenPeak sure looks a lot like Apples wonder phone. The frame is the center piece for the wireless phones.

They’ve been working on it for about a year and it should be available in early 2009, priced from $200 and $300, distributed by telecom service providers. I wonder if they’re also planning on providing cool apps so you can really get the whole experience of an iPhone for the home. I wonder if this could fly.

The Iocell Contents Phone looks pretty cool, but it has a big mouth, like that one friend of yours. It doesn’t keep things to itself, since it contains within it a hard disk which can be used for sending your conversations anywhere on the web.

Sure, it has an awesome look and will give you music on hold, record your conversations and play background music while you talk, but just remember, even if you don’t own one, the person you’re talking to might own one. In other words, be careful what you say from now on. Good looking phones are looking to snitch on you to the internets and hang you out to dry. From now on I’m just saying yeah, uh-huh and bye.

Alright, so this is only cool to those who are easily amused and you know who you are. If this was your new phone, then you’d have to call your friends and tell them, “Dude I’m calling from a Bud bottle.” And of course hilarity would ensue. The best part is if you ever have a brawl in your living room, you can hit somebody on the head with your phone and hopefully it won’t leave you holding only shards and the neck of the bottle. Dial the number, then knock that other drunk bastard out just as his mom answers and you tell her to pick his sorry ass up. Yeah this phone is made for drunken fun, frat parties, and of course it’s perfect white trash decor.

Smoke em if you’ve got em boys. Yet another custom phone. This time, they’ve combined the phone with a carton of smokes. That way it will make more sense when you eventually dial 911 to talk about your breathing problems. Daddy go out for a carton of smokes and never come back? Daddy may be gone, but his memory will remain with this phone.

Here’s the perfect phone for that dark smoky back room, by the cash counting machine and crates full of contriband. It says “I want my money now, or else…”. It also says, I make so much money I don’t even care that I look like an idiot holding a stack of fake dough to my head that’s actually a corded phone. But who’s gonna laugh? You’re the head honcho. If you have a silly cash phone, that’s totally your call. Get it?

It goes with the gun phone quite nicely. This phone is also the phone of choice for bill collectors and pimps.

Tony Montana would love to have this phone on his desk. It also makes a great gag gift for your other “business associates”. It’s the phone to use when you mean business. This phone says, I may not be sure who is going to get whacked tonight, but somebody’s going in the river, so let’s lighten the mood a bit as I take this call on my gun.

The telephone is built into the grip of the gun and has an on/off switch near the trigger. It also has a headset jack. You listen and talk by placing the gun to your head, so it’s a better gag if you tell your friend to answer it as you put it to their head. Keeps him honest, ya know.

I’m not sure what it is about lips this week. This is the second bizarre device we’ve found this week that had a pair of lips attached. The first was the kiss phone. The Lips Hands Free Phone Kit is a bit different. This is for those who might want a video phone but can’t afford it. They believe that this hands-free calling kit might be an acceptable compromise.

It clips onto any land line or mobile phone and adds hands-free speakerphone capabilities, but the best part is that it also includes a pair of animated lips that move in sync with the other person talking. No matter who you are talking to from then on, it will always seem that you are talking with a weird female duck-bot thing that mimics the voices of those you know and love. All for the low of price of $18.

Normally we give traditional wireless home phones about as much attention around here as talking moose heads on the wall, but when the New York Times points out one which might be cool we have to check it out. They in fact seem to be right - the forthcoming GE Premiere DECT 6.0 28821FJ3 has a nifty GOOG-411 button centered for you to press for business information calls.

GOOG-411 you say? Isn’t that a Google property? That’s right - Thomson and Google inked a little paid attention to deal at CES last month which brings the one-touch, auto-dial GOOG-411 button functionality to a number of its 2008 DECT 6.0 Interference Free phones. This feature is tied to Google’s free, voice-activated, business directory assistance service and will actually be part of more than a dozen GE phones, available in April.

Mild mannered blogger by day, red phone wielding crusader by night. That’s the way we like it here at SlipperyBrick now that we’ve got word of a new red Batphone designed by AbleComm and available for sale for $112.

The red Batphone is inspired by the Batman television series from the 60s. While you don’t have Alfred the butler around to answer it for you can still feel like you are Adam West getting ready to suit up for crime fighting when the phone’s bright red light lights up and flashes to draw your attention.

Belkin introduced it’s new Desktop Internet Phone for Skype, which allows you to make free Skype Internet calls without having to turn on your computer. That’s something I would make some desk space for. It’s simple to setup and easy to use and brings the Skype experience to more people and at an affordable price.

It will be available in March 2008 in the US, Canada, Europe, and Asia. The price is $99 U.S.

The Projection Telephone is basically a house phone which will project the number and details of the call on the ceiling or wall each time there’s an incoming call. It doesn’t sound like a big deal, but can you think of a faster easier way to see that info? Even with the best phones, you won’t see a caller’s info that immediately. It comes in handy for those calls you would rather avoid. Once you see that the person who’s calling is someone you’d rather not speak with, just shrug and get back to whatever it was you were doing.

The power saving LED light will last about 100,000 hours, so you will croak long before it does. This one is all about convenience. It just happens to be very cool as well.

Magic Jack is a complete phone service on a USB key. Just plug it into your computer’s USB port, then plug a telephone line into the MagicJack and the MagicJack software will automatically load. Now you will be able to make and receive calls with any home telephone.

Comes with a phone number, magicfree local and long distance, free voicemail that receives messages whether you are offline or not, caller ID, call waiting, free directory assistance, call forwarding, free three way calling, and 911. See, I wasn’t lying. A complete phone service. The price is $39.95 for the first year and $19.95 for the each year after. I know. Sweet! MagicJack also has international prepaid packages starting at $5.

The MP3 Telephone Recorder ia capable of recording up to 50 hours of conversation on it’s internal 128MB flash memory. The recording device fits between the handset and the actual telephone, and gives you the option of manual or automatic voice-activated recording.

Playback is in a non-standard audio format to prevent the unauthorised use by someone other then yourself. Connect it to the PC via USB socket and use a password to access the memory on the device. At that point the software converts the non-standard format into MP3 as the password decrypts the audio stream.

The once mighty pay phone is now going the way of the dodo as mobile phones are the way of today. AT&T sees the writing on the wall and is getting off the sinking ship, announcing today it plans to exit the pay phone business by the end of 2008.

AT&T said pay phones in the United States have declined over the last 10 years from around 2.6 million phones to a measly 1 million today. The company sees no reason to remain in this business any longer and “plans to phase out both public pay phones and phones provided under contracts at government correctional facilities through the end of next year.”