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Archive for Apparel

Cleavage Caddy makes your boobs look like an episode of Hoarders

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on January 11th, 2010

I’m an adult, so I’m well aware that some women tuck things away and hide them in their massive cleavage, whether it be a key, a wad of cash, whatever. But I never knew that they hid enough things in there to warrant the Cleavage Caddy, which is basically a boob wallet. A brallet if you will.

But if you start storing stuff in your Cleavage Caddy, doesn’t that just make boobs look all misshapen and angular rather than pleasing to the male eye? This might be better marketed at guys with man-boobs.

Snow Shorts with a built-in Butt-Sled

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on December 6th, 2009

Snow Shorts with a built-in Butt-SledSledding is fun for both kids and adults. But as a kid, I always hated lugging a heavy sled around and having to carry it back up the hill. It ruins the whole thing and makes it a pain. Well, thanks to Pull on Snow Shorts from Orvis, that problem is solved.

You won’t have to worry about carrying your sled up the hill again and again because the sled is now your butt. Yes, it’s a wearable sled! Just wear the snow shorts over your pants and get your butt on that snow. It comes in 3 sizes: small kids, big kids, and adult for $35.

Carbon Fiber iWallet sounds an alarm if stolen

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on December 2nd, 2009

Carbon Fiber iWallet sounds an alarm if stolenIf you are always worried about your wallet being stolen, the iWallet might help ease your mind and keep your cash and credit cards safe. The iWallet is a Kevlar and carbon fiber wallet that features a fingerprint reader, so that only you can open it.

It also has built-in Bluetooth so that the wallet can detect when it’s too far away from your cell phone(stolen) and sound an alarm. Thing is at $600, or just $300 for the fiberglass version, what money will you have left?

Nice Cup In Bra doubles as a golf putting mat

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on November 11th, 2009

Nice Cup In Bra doubles as a golf putting matGolfers would like nothing better than to combine their sport with boobs, somehow. But that’s a tall order for a sport like golf. Thankfully for golfers lingerie maker Triumph International Japan has unveiled a new concept bra designed to appeal to female golfing enthusiasts. And men who want to get them topless.

It’s called the “Nice Cup In Bra,” and consists of a grass-green top that, when removed, unfolds into a 1.5-meter-long putting mat. The user can then sink a putt into one of the cups, when a built-in speaker will exclaim “Nice shot.”

New Dragon Backpack

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on November 9th, 2009

New Dragon BackpackNo the image above does not show a black dragon attacking that man. Nor is it dry-humping his back while he walks on unaware. The man wears the beast willingly. For it is the New Dragon Backpack. The perfect accessory to hold all of your D & D books and dice, WoW stuff etc.

Yes, it’s a backpack that looks like a dragon is humping you, while nuzzling your neck lovingly. For some reason you can even open its mouth to place your cellphone inside.

Forget Air Guitar, play the Rock Guitar Shirt

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on October 29th, 2009

Forget Air Guitar, play the Rock Guitar Shirt Now you can retire from your gig as air guitar rocker and play your shirt instead. This Electronic Rock Guitar Shirt even has its own mini amplifier. When you strum the shirt with the special magnetic pick, it delivers some awesome distorted-sounding guitar chords.

You can’t rock individual notes, but there are 15 different power cords, covering all the major keys. Once you figure out where to activate each of the chords on the shirt’s “frets,” just press your finger there and start strumming.

Equalizer Music Hat

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on October 25th, 2009

Equalizer Music HatHere’s a great Equalizer Music hat, just in time for winter. This equalizer hat features blue luminescent displays in either side, which light up to the beat of your music, so pump up those jams and keep fashionably warm.

Just plug in your MP3 or music player with a headphone jack to show off your tunes right on your head. It will cost you about $30 and will apparently make girls look cute as a button. It’s also a great way to annoy those around you on your commute.

Blue Screen of Death belt

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on October 19th, 2009

Blue Screen of Death beltMan, my underpants are really unstable. You zip your pants up wrong or tighten your belt too much and bam, everything freezes up and I get the Blue Screen of Death on my belt buckle. Control-Alt-Delete doesn’t seem to work, which really sucks because it takes a while to boot up my junk again.

BSOD humor is apparently alive and well and invading belts. You get a metal buckle with clam style closure, a cotton/acrylic blend of fabric for the belt and an image of the Blue Screen of Death.

Star Wars Jedi Bath Robes

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on September 27th, 2009

Star Wars Jedi Bath RobesCheck out these Jedi Bath Robes. They’re perfect for all of the nerdy Jedi secret meetings you and your friends have. You know, the ones where you re-enact classic scenes and spank each other with lightsabers saying. “Thank you sir, may I have another?”

Good times no doubt. And you’ll remain comfy through all of your shenanigans, since these Jedi robes are made of soft 100% cotton velour. Of course, the Jedi logo is embroidered on the front. And the hood is large enough that you can hide your face in shame when you wear it in public.

Lego Baseplate Shirt may be the nerdiest shirt ever

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on September 17th, 2009

Lego Baseplate Shirt may be the nerdiest shirt everThis shirt is an awesome idea, but it might be a little too much. I mean, Legos are great and wearing a Lego construction on your chest sounds neat in theory. But in practice I imagine it might not be so cool.

The Brick Construction Shirt features a Lego baseplate on the chest so that you can build whatever you want in bricks and display it. You know, like a TIE Fighter, a message, whatever. Sounds pretty uncomfortable and I’m sure your creations will spend most of their time falling off.

Vending machine for Jeans

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on August 27th, 2009

Vending machine for JeansYou can find a vending machine for almost anything these days. We’ve seen our share of strange vending machines, from weird to just practical. We aren’t sure which category this one fits into.

I suppose it would come in handy for the traveler who has soiled his Jeans and has to look presentable in a hurry. It’s from Hamburg based Closed jeans who set up a vending machine in Florence, Italy to test the concept. If it goes well, they will introduce it in train stations across Europe.

i-3D Video Glasses

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on August 17th, 2009

i-3D Video GlassesThe i-3D Video Glasses will not only make you look like the X-Men’s Cyclops, they can also display video at 920,000 pixels at an aspect ratio of 4:3. They weigh in at only 2.4-ounces and have stereo earbud speakers along with a wide 35-degree diagonal viewing angle.

Some other features include a USB charging cable, a remote control and adjustable brightness and contrast. The device gets it’s power from a 1,000mAh rechargeable Lithium-ion battery that gives you enough juice for roughly 3.5-hours per charge. Sadly you can’t focus an energy beam and shoot people.

Hippo foot massager

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on August 12th, 2009

Hippo foot massagerWould you wear a foot massager that’s really a slipper with two Hippos on it? You know you would, because massages feel great. Just don’t let anyone catch you. Ever. You don’t want it getting around the office. It’s a slipper for two feet at once, which makes it even weirder.

Oh and it comes from a company called Farting Hippo. So maybe the idea is that the vibration of hippo farts make a good massage. The question is, do you need a massage bad enough to wear this? Terrible as this is, it’s a tough call. Just don’t get caught.

Portable Tap Dispenser

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on August 9th, 2009

Portable Tap DispenserThe Portable Tap Dispenser is a backpack with a dispensing tap that holds whatever brew you choose. It keeps the party firmly on your back. It also has a cupholder. Not since ghostbusters have backpacks been so cool. I don’t know about you, but I would rather be drinking than catching ghosts. Still, don’t cross the streams, that would be bad.

We don’t know what the capacity is, but it looks big enough to get you good and drunk. Maybe then you’ll see ghosts and try to catch them with beer. It will cost you $35.

Flipside Wallet protects you from RFID theft

Posted in Apparel by Conner Flynn on August 4th, 2009

Flipside Wallet protects you from RFID theftThe Flipside Wallet is a wallet for the 21st century. It’s a front pocket wallet that acts like a traditional bi-fold, but has some added features for the times we live in. It’s secure, durable and functional. The Flipside Wallet is made from high strength polymers and anodized aluminum alloy components.

The interesting part is that the wallet will also shield your Credit and I.D. cards from RFID theft. Carry all of your cash, cards and pictures like you normally do. Everything is just more secure.