The Gerber Kick Axe is not what you use to open Gerber baby food. It’s a more portable, foldable way of having an axe on you at all times, for things like: Chopping wood, terrorizing a camp while wearing a hockey mask, disposing of bodys, and more chopping wood.

A typical horror movie scene with the old school un-foldable axe goes something like this: Killer approaches victim(slowly) with a very obvious axe in one hand. Victim runs. Crappy music and a crappy chase follow, until he hacks he/her/they up. With the new and improved axe, that same scene goes like this: Killer approaches victim(slowly), with no obvious weapon in hand. He certainly doesn’t have an axe, because axes are long and obvious. Victim does not run. Killer smiles. Hey. Hi. What’s up? Killer unfolds his axe and get’s his victim. You see what happened there? This gadget/weapon has completely done away with the chase scene with the bad music and by doing so has cut every bad horror movie down to just 30 minutes. Awesome.

The battery in Apple’s new 17″ MacBook Pro is pretty amazing. With a single charge it can power the notebook for about eight hours while using the NVIDIA 9400M graphics processor or seven hours while the 9600M GT chip is at work. Also, it has a charge cycle life of 1,000 charges which is a quantum leap ahead of a standard laptop battery.

But no matter how good the specs are, it’s bound to have problems. Most likely problems will occur after the one-year battery warranty has expired. This one can’t be replaced by end-users, so what happens if it dies after the five-year lifespan and you want to swap it out for a new one ? (Even though chances are you’ll have a new notebook by then)

Typing on the computer all day can lead to some problems. And I’m not talking lack of sleep and a steady diet of Hot Pockets. I’m talking carpal tunnel syndrome. Between comments on Facebook, twitter, gaming and commenting here at the ‘Brick, we are all just one keystroke away from carpal tunnel at any given time. The Smartfish Pro is designed to help prevent it rather then causing it.

Yeah, we’ve heard it all before. There are all kinds of ergonomic gadgets on the market and most seem like they don’t do jack. There’s even an ergonomic mouse or five. The Smartfish Pro actually has a chance of helping the problem and standing out from the crowd. That’s because it is outfitted with motors that slightly shift the keyboards angle throughout the entire day. This may actually help with repetitive stress injuries.

Epson isn’t just about printers, though we tend to associate the name with printers. They make lots of other stuff too. Epson Japan has announced it’s latest Business to Business laptop dubbed the Endeavor NA802.

The 13.3 inch WXGA notebook comes packed with a Core 2 Duo P8400 processor, an nVidia GeForce 9600M GT with 256MB of VRAM, 1GB to 4GB of RAM, and a wide range of 5400 or 7200rpm HDDs or a 128GB (MLC) SSD drive. The new Endeavor NA802 also features a WiFiLink 5300AGN module with Windows Vista or XP Pro OS. No word on pricing or availability.

The Roswell the Alien Wall Plaque has a few different uses. For one, it makes it look like you caught one and imprisoned it in your wall. Which is good because if a real alien shows up one night to abduct you for study, he’ll see this on your wall and hightail it out of there. Plus, he’ll tell his friends and thus you will be safe.

It’s also the sort of thing that comes in handy for scaring away unwanted house guests who like to spend the night. Just put this up in your guest room and no one will want to sleep over. It comes in three pieces: a head and two hands, so you can move them about to create the look that you want.

If you’ve been drooling over the 1.5 pound, 8″ VAIO P and want it to be your next netbook, Sony has started taking pre-orders. Like Wimpy from Popeye, who will gladly pay you next week if you buy him a hamburger, Sony is ready to take your money in exchange for the laptop in February.

It starts at $899 and can cost up to $1,499 depending on what you want. You can choose from a color palette of five hues. Me? I’ll pass. Strikes me as kinda girlly and clutch purse like. Some like the long and thin form factor though and it does feature a crazy high resolution on it’s tiny screen. It also sports an instant-boot OS that gives you access to the Internet and your pictures, music and other stuff.

So you’re an old school kind of guy or gal. You miss those retro floppy discs and refuse to use Cd-Rs for anything but a coaster. Well, this Floppy CD-R disc will make it all right. They look like a standard 3.5″ floppy, but the underside has the shiny spankable bottom of a CD-R.

Since it’s square, it won’t be able to hold the standard CD-R amount, but that’s okay. 200MB is still 138 times more than the original floppy. The $10 price tag is a bit steep, but at least you can mesmerize your friends with your inability to let go of the past. A 4-pack will cost you $28, so you can save some money buying more than one.

Sadly, we kinda saw this one coming. Apple has issued a statement saying that Steve Jobs will be taking a leave of absence due to health reasons. Jobs sent out a letter to Apple employees today that stated that his previously-explained health problems are “more complex” than he first thought, and that he also plans to return in June.

Not to worry, he will still be around for major strategy decisions and the like, and Tim Cook will take over the day-to-day stuff while he’s away. Whether an Apple fan or not, most of us admire the man and what he has accomplished. Here’s to hoping he makes a complete recovery and things get back to normal. Check out the letter below.

The details are a bit sketchy, but the word coming out of Sweden is that some 35-year-old tech obsessed dude was brazen enough to steal several prototype phones from Sony Ericsson’s Lund offices on Monday or Tuesday. As you might expect, he was arrested on Wednesday when police found the prototypes at his home. Oh and he apparently also had a hundred other phones.

According to Sony Ericsson, the thief wasn’t employed by them, but had a “working relationship” with the company. They think he used a pass card to gain entry to the building. Police also got their hands on a laptop with some questionable content. They’re estimating the total value of the theft totaled about $90,000.

Panasonic was showcasing a lot of new compact camcorders at CES last week. Two of these new models are the SDR-S15 and SDR-SW21, priced around $300 and $400, respectively.

These new Panasonic camcorders both record video to SD/SDHC memory cards. Each serves different consumer audiences – the SDR-SW21 is much more rugged in design, including being waterproof up to 6.5 feet, so it is geared towards outdoor crowds. The SDR-S15 is more of a film one’s friends at the birthday party kind of model.

Archos is taking its first step into the world of laptops, announcing today its first mini laptop. It is called the Archos 10 and it prices around $400 for a three-cell battery model and $450 for a six-cell battery model.

The Archos 10 is pretty much a netbook, the latest category laptops to be garnering the attention of consumers. This particular model runs off of an Intel Atom processor and 1GB of memory. The operating system is Windows XP, 160GB of hard drive storage are available and it sports a 10.2-inch display.

Here’s one hell of a conceptual design: the Cadillac World Thorium Fuel concept. Otherwise known as the Cadillac WTF. It was created by Loren Kulesus. Everything about the aptly named WTF has been created to last for 100 years without maintenance. That’s the reason for the element number ninety, thorium: to act as a nuclear fuel powering batteries that would power this beast.

Also, every major system is redundant just in case of a failure. Even the wheels are covered and shouldn’t give you much trouble. The wheels don’t have individual tires. In fact, what you get is one combined unit made up of six individual wheels. That gives you 24 wheels in all, and each wheel has its own induction motor just for good measure. According to the creator, “The vehicle would require the tires to be adjusted every five years, but no material would need to be added or subtracted.”

The ioSafe Solo External Hard Drive is great for those who need to protect their data from every eventuality. It will survive a fire for 30 minutes as well as being submerged in ten feet of water for 10 minutes. I’m not sure that will do you much good in your everyday life, but if the inhabitants of Atlantis had had these, their secrets would have survived. Maybe. So let that be a lesson to you.

For $199 you can get a 500GB model, but, since this thing is pretty bomb-proof, you’ll have a hard time upgrading the drive in there so you may want to go straight for the $349 1.5TB model. Early adopters will get $50 off.

If you believe the guys over at IGN, it seems that Nintendo’s DSi will be dropping much sooner than anyone had thought. There’s also a rumored price for the new DSi. IGN’s sources put the DSi’s release somewhere around April 4. The price is apparently going to be $179.99. It’s much higher than the DS Lite at $129.99 due to the DS Lite’s popularity. So, they want to squeeze some extra Mario coins out of ya.

Nintendo wants buyers to see the DS Lite as the system for casual gamers and the DSi to be seen as the system for serious gamers. Looks like the info is dead on, but until Nintendo makes an official announcement, it’s still speculation.

Apple recently announced that it was doing away with it’s unfair DRM copy protection. Awesome news. Going one step further, the company is giving anyone who’s ever bought songs on iTunes the ability to upgrade their music to DRM-free versions. For a fee of course. There is a catch. As Wilson Rothman over at Gizmodo discovered, you have to upgrade all of them at once.

That really sucks, because if you’ve been at it for awhile just downloading away over the years, you have a problem. Costs can easily be in the hundreds of dollars. There is no way to upgrade your titles individually. Things like this are why some of us don’t use the service. They’re going to make you pay again for songs you already bought? Nice one Apple.